Maintain Speed. Keep Moving.

A couple months ago I was driving to Pennsylvania for a close friends wedding and as I was approaching a toll booth I noticed a sign that read "Maintain speed. Keep moving." I'm sure that I have passed that sign several times and it really is there to warn drivers to avoid an accident near the toll booth but this time around it really caught my attention. I couldn't stop thinking about that sign the whole time I was driving. Maintain speed. Keep moving forward.

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith." Hebrews 12:2

Notice that this verse says to RUN with perseverance. Not walk, not jog, not even power walk but RUN. I don't ever want to downplay or belittle the times in our lives where we must slow down, take a deep breath and be still before our heavenly Father because that is all indeed part of the race. However, sometimes we need to brush ourselves off, get up and RUN towards all that God has planned for us. Maintaining speed and moving forward. This verse has really been challenging my heart in many ways. It has been helping me to keep my eyes fixed on Christ, not looking to the left or the right and what everybody else around me is accomplishing and doing but keeping my gaze straight on towards Christ. It has helped me to really think about the race that Christ has marked out specifically for me, in this time, in this season of my life.

"There is one thing you are responsible for. Only one thing matters: Run the race marked out for you. Run forward toward the finish line with every ounce of strength in you and with your eyes fixed on Jesus, so that you too can one day say: 

'I have fount the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith 2 Timothy 4:7'" 

Christine Caine-Unstoppable 

I want to run this race well, with perseverance, moving forward, and seizing the opportunities that are in front of me. I want to run the race marked out for me. With all that being said I will be volunteering again with Mercy Ships from January 2017-June this time in Cotonou, Benin! The opportunity is here and the time is now and I don't want to waste any time. As I go the race will change. Seasons will change. I know I won't run this race with Mercy Ships forever. It is just one leg of the race that is molding,shaping and preparing me for the other legs of this divine race.

The first question I have been receiving is where is Benin?!?

I'm not sure what specialty/ward I will be working in until I get there but definitely hoping to work in the women's health program again. I will also be living and working on the ship the entire time this field service which is what most people do anyway. Last year's on land living was the exception to the rule due to the land based OBF clinic. On the right hand corner of this blog I have put some links with facts about Benin, a Mada II recap video (highly recommend) and some more information about the part you can play in this journey. 

As always I am so very thankful for your continued support, love, kind words and prayers!

Love Always,

Deborah

"God Almighty, who calls you by name, wants to make you a partner in his eternal work. He invites us to be world-changers by sharing the good news of eternal life and caring for the needs of a broken, hurting world. That's what running the race marked out for you is all about." 

                                                  Christine Caine- Unstoppable

Although I am currently serving with Mercy Ships, everything communicated here strictly reflects my personal opinions and is neither reviewed nor endorsed by Mercy Ships. Opinions, conclusions and other information expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of Mercy Ships.

Women Power

I wouldn't call myself a feminist. Maybe it seems to extreme for me. Maybe it's cause I grew up in a house where I was outnumbered by men. I recognize how important men are to our society. God fearing, praying, obedient, hard working and committed men are the backbone of the family. They set the tone for how a household is run. Read what the bible says about men and the responsibility they are charged with and we can discuss further. I really wanna talk about women in this post but shout out to godly men living their lives for Christ, shaping family's, churches, businesses and the future generation.  

Lately, I have been thinking about the strength, influence, and courage women have. I have recently started volunteering some time at a place called the Walter Hoving Home in Garrison, NY. It is a spiritually based program that serves women who are involved in drug and alcohol addiction, prostitution and other life controlling problems. This organization has incredible success rates and is definitely worth checking out  http://walterhovinghome.org/about-us/ 

I can't help but compare and see the similarities these ladies have with the obstetric fistula patients I took care of in Madagascar. Ladies who maybe living on the opposites sides of the world, in different situations but both battling depression, loneliness, broken relationships, suicide, and complete loss of identity and hope. But God. With God and people being obedient to the call to spread his good news both groups of ladies declare testimonies filled with redemption, hope, joy peace and a future. Listening to the ladies testimonies and stories at the Walter Hoving Home has made my eyes fill up with tears of joy and my heart burst because in a way it transports me back to dress ceremony celebrations in Madagascar. 

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, 

clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, 

humility, gentleness and patience." 

Colossians 3:12

This all got me thinking that there is just something so incredible about seeing confidence, hope and courage being restored to a woman. Not because she can then go out, conquer the world and defeat men. Just the opposite actually. A woman who is confident and finds her identity in Christ can be a more influential woman, coworker, daughter, sister, friend, wife and mother. All of these rolls that women have greatly affect the next generation. If a woman can be a better mom, she can empower her daughter to be bold, and fearless which in turn will effect the women after her. If a woman can confidently support, encourage and stand by her husband and children the family unit will instantly fortify. Most importantly, when women stop tearing each other down, and criticizing one another we can be a force to be reckoned with. We can be unified, steadfast, and absolute world changers. Whether it is good or bad our actions, words and lives all have a ripple effect. What I love about the Walter Hoving Home and nursing obstetric fistula patients is watching how strong and banded these circles of women are. I love watching how powerful and effective they can be as a group. I love watching them build each other up and how they propel each other forward into all that God has for them. 

Maybe this isn't about just women. Maybe its really about men and women coming along aside each other and working together to truly bring God's kingdom alive here on earth. Maybe I'm just sick of all the negativity, and division swirling around me on the news, media and sometimes even my own life. 

This has all been challenging me lately. Maybe I'm just giving myself a pep talk here but to all the women out there: You have something inside of you. You bear Christ's image. You are a daughter of the most high God. You have talents, gifts, and characteristics that no other women has that have been given specifically to you to influence the people all around you. Be Bold. Be Courageous. Because Christ lives in you. You are His. Stop beating your self up. Live every day to fullest and walk in confidence that goodness and mercy shall follow you all the days of your life. 

"Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is. 

Treat a man as he can be and should be and 

he will become as he can be and should be."

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe 

So How Was Madagascar?

How was Mercy Ships? How were the living/working conditions? What kind of patients did you take care of? What was Madagascar like? Did you see any lemurs? Pretty much the variety of questions I have heard over the last two months. I have also heard things like I could never do that, you are such a good person, or your my hero. While I appreciate all of that I can't tell you how much it is NOT about me. I love to tell you these patient's stories not because I want recognition or praise but because I want you to be aware of what is going on around us. I want you to see how God's love combined with some practical measures like good, accessible healthcare is changing peoples lives everyday aboard the Africa Mercy. To all those friends and family that have listened to my stories and experiences thank you. Thank you for your open hearts and listening ears. I get joy knowing that a couple more people are aware of what is going on all around the world, are willing to listen and just maybe are inspired to do something out of their comfort zone and serve other people with their time, prayers, money and abilities. It has also helped me personally to kind of process my experiences and work through this transition time so thank you from the bottom of my heart and from the heart of the beautiful people of Madagascar.

I know what you are thinking though..... while these stories are inspiring not everybody can or wants to pick up and go volunteer in a foreign country. I totally get that but I'm also becoming more aware of the importance of serving others right here in my own hometown. I'm aware of the fact that there are patients, friends, family members, co-workers and people all around me that could use a word of encouragement, a simple act of kindness, or see God's love through me. I'll admit I have had some difficult days these last couple of weeks. Days where I kind of felt like I was in a fog and wondering if the last 6 months had actually happened. It has been difficult to see the ways I can serve right here at home when all I can think about is how tangible and evident it was seeing peoples lives impacted and changed for the better in Madagascar. It has been difficult to watch people take our abundant healthcare system for granted when all I can picture in my head are the smiles and thankful hearts of the people of Madagascar. It has been difficult to adjust to a completely different working environment and mindset than the Africa Mercy. But then I'm reminded of how this whole journey started. It started with a step. Fill out the application for Mercy Ships. Actually submit the application. Wait. Make a commitment. Book a flight. With each step God kept saying trust me. Give me that desire of your heart. Give me your talents, and abilities. Give me a small amount of your time and finances and watch how I multiply it all and touch peoples lives. So no I don't expect you to get up and volunteer with Mercy Ships tomorrow but I encourage you and myself really to take new steps of faith everyday. Small steps that will lead you to people, organizations, groups, and activities that will challenge, stretch, strengthen and grow you. And then watch how God transforms the lives of the people you come in contact with and even your own life.

I have also recently thought to myself what do I really miss from last 6 months? Is it the friends I made? The patients? The ship? Dress ceremony celebrations? I suppose you could say all of the above. I miss seeing lives transformed, hope being restored, I miss watching the VVF ladies bond and stay up late at night talking and laughing, and I miss the community of people all working for the same purpose. On the other hand, I think we often idealize people, situations and circumstances. When I think about it there were tough days over the course of those 6 months, days that I wanted to be home, frustrating work days and days where living in community with people all over the world was difficult. So I'm trying to have a healthy balance as I reflect on my time with Mercy Ships. In the end, I don't regret anything and without any hesitation would do it all again. Was it always perfect no. Was it worth every minute most definitely yes.

So there you have it. Nothing fancy. Just some of my own thoughts and feelings over the last two months. I'm adjusting, and continuing to take steps of faith. I'm so very thankful for this time at home to spend with family and friends and remaining hopeful for whatever is next. Whether that be returning with Mercy Ships or not I know that God has incredible plans for me. I thank you for reading and welcome any discussion or questions you have about my time with Mercy Ships.


These videos contain the full story of a man name Sambany who came to Mercy Ships in the first field service in Madagascar. His story is incredible! Enjoy!

Leavin' On A Jet Plane

My last week on the ship was filled with precious moments and I didn't hesitate to soak up every last second. Conversations and laughing with friends over dinner. Visiting hidden sites of Tamatave. Snuggling with our pediatric patients, deck 7 time with all the patients, singing and walking with the ladies down the corridors of the ward. Dress ceremony celebration. In the end I couldn't have asked for a better time with Mercy Ships. I was a part of setting up and working in the OBF clinic, lived off ship, and then worked and lived on the ship. I didn't just work with the VVF ladies on the ship either I had opportunities to work on every ward which allowed me to care for maxofacial patients, orthopedic kids, plastics and reconstruction, and general surgical patients. They all had their own challenges but each one allowed me to learn something new and interact with patients from all walks of life. 

It is surreal that something I talked about and thought about for so long is now complete. Almost six months and my time with Mercy Ships and in Madagascar is over. When you think about all of this it really is an odd way of experiencing life. You leave your home, invest deeply in a foreign country, patients and a community of people and then a time comes to leave again. Sounds crazy but it goes to show that there is something contagious and completely rewarding about pouring yourself out in service to others and growing in community. The topic here though is leaving. Short and long term crew alike will leave. Crew members that have been there for 20 years will eventually leave. If working with Mercy Ships has taught me anything it is that things change constantly. 

"Goodbyes are not forever.

Goodbyes are not the end.

They simply mean I'll miss you

Until we meet again."

People every Saturday leave the ship and go back to their homes, families, sometimes a job and sometimes not a job. After awhile they will naturally return to "normal" life or a "normal" routine. I suppose you could be thinking what is bad about returning to a "normal" routine?!? Absolutely nothing. In the effort to balance the weight of the last six months with returning home, I wonder if I will forget all that I have seen, forget the patients, and forgot all that I have learned along the way.  I know you just spoke the words "that's impossible" out loud ;) The reality is that things will change, I will forget some things and life will continue to move on both at home and in Madagascar. I'm reminding myself that returning home in no way diminishes this experience, the things I have learned about myself and God, the friendships formed, or the interactions with patients. It has all challenged me, enlarged my heart, and has completely ruined me for living life in any way that is short of extraordinary and I wouldn't change one thing about it all. 

What does extraordinary living look like for me next? Not entirely sure but I know that I will continue to walk this journey one step at a time. I will choose to be thankful for all that God has done so far and choose to believe that this season of my life will continue to propel me forward into all the good plans God has in store for me. 

Would you join me in continuing to pray for the patients aboard the Africa Mercy and would you pray for strength and energy for every crew member as this field service comes to a close. 

I start my journey home in a couple of hours and I'm so looking forward to being home, and talking with you all face to face. Would you pray for safe travels and smooth flights. 

Just a sneak peak at some of the pictures from my recent travels around Madagascar.....

Lasting Impact

As I prepare myself to leave this floating hospital ship in two weeks I'm trying to reflect on and post about experiences that have really stood out to me and impacted me during this time.

One aspect that I truly admire about Mercy Ships is its dedication to making sure that certain programs are sustainable after the Africa Mercy departs from a country. Being in Madagascar for two field service has given them an unique opportunity to really find out what education and resources the healthcare system needs. Over the last two field services Mercy Ships has implemented many educational sessions for doctors, surgeons and nurses, a surgical checklist to ensure safety in operating rooms and renovated an operating room and two buildings at the local hospital here in Tamatave.The obstetric fistula clinic that I worked in is also part of this medical capacity program. I might have mentioned it before but this clinic will be employed by Malagasy nurses and supported by another organization called Freedom From Fistula after the Africa Mercy leaves.

One of the most challenging and yet rewarding part of my time here has been training those local nurses. I have oriented nurses at home but this was very different. We don't speak the same language. Our training and education as nurses was different. Our culture is different. Add the fact that I don't have any women's health background and was learning about obstetric fistulas myself and it sounds like a recipe for disaster huh?!? They had classroom sessions with our Mercy Ships crew educator and then worked 12 hr. shifts at the clinic and on the ward at the ship. At first these local nurses were shy, and not really giving us much indication that they were learning anything. Over the weeks we slowly passed on the knowledge and skills we were learning about caring for obstetric fistula patients. We were learning and growing together and I think as time passed they started trusting us. They started asking questions, critically thinking and taking initiative with their patients. It was such a joy to see the look on there face when they finally put the pieces together, realized the significance of what they were doing and why they were performing a procedure a certain way. All the skills, knowledge, and facts that we instill in them can't compare to the fact that we are also showing them how to love patients like Jesus would. Showing compassion, loving the least of these is all completely counter-intuitive to the culture of nursing here in Madagascar. These local nurses are taught that not only can they medically care for their patients differently, more effectively and with best practices but that they also can holistically, compassionately and lovingly care for their own people.

I don't say all this to boast or pat myself on that back but to say how completely humbled and thankful I am for the opportunity to work together with these local nurse and to play a small part in teaching and molding them. Nurses who can change the culture of nursing in Madagascar, who will care for the thousands of other obstetric  fistula patients that I can't care for and will continue to compassionately and lovingly care for the poorest of poor, the least of these and some of the strongest and most beautiful ladies of Madagascar.

This video will give you more details about the medical capacity programs. Enoy!  

Although I am currently serving with Mercy Ships, everything communicated here strictly reflects my personal opinions and is neither reviewed nor endorsed by Mercy Ships. Opinions, conclusions and other information expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of Mercy Ships. 

The Least Of These

In every nurses career there are patients and family members you simply will never forget. If you are a nurse reading this you know what I'm talking about...the difficult patient, the baby that despite so many obstacles survived, that one code in the ER, the patient that passed away or the family members that faithfully stood by their loved one. I have said it before but these ladies will forever be etched in my heart and mind. Their stories, faces, the joys and the sorrows. Their stories all have a running theme. Pregnancy. Days of labor without access to any kind of medical care and the nearest hospital is a days walk away or further. If they never make it to the hospital the baby will die and the body will instinctively begin the process of expelling the baby. If they make it to the hospital and can actually afford the cesarean they need it is often still too late. After enduring this traumatic labor that results in the loss of a child they now have a hole in between their bladder and birth canal causing them to constantly leak urine. What once was supposed to be a time of joy and bringing forth new life results in death. Death of a child, death of a women's identity, hope, joy and future.

’‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?" Matthew 25:37-39

I have not written about specific patients because at this point accurately portraying their story seems like a daunting task and one that I will never give full justice too.I must have sat down a dozen times trying to describe this one patients story. She is fourteen years old. She embodies Mercy Ships line "poorest of poor." Her name is Minette and I will never forget her. 

Her story is very similar to what I just described. Another mercy ships crew nurse that works closely with the local hospital in Tamatave found Minette. The nurses at the local hospital were begging her to help Minette claiming she was the poorest patient they have ever seen. To get an accurate picture of the local hospital and the condition Minette was found in I strongly recommend you read the following post by the lovely Amy Jones https://throughaporthole.wordpress.com/2016/01/05/all-she-wanted-was-chicken/ Amy, team leaders and surgeons advocated to transfer Minette from the local hospital to the clinic which is not part of Mercy Ships normal screening process. They did not have to fight too hard. The committee saw the poorest of the poor sitting right in front of them and could not delay action. 

I"ll never forget the look on her face the first night Minette came to the clinic. Eyes wide, scared, fearful and full of pain. We started from the basics. We gave her a bath. Lovingly and gently nurses cleaned her skinny, boney, sore body that had been sitting in urine for days. We took all the appropriate steps to care for her medically but we first started with loving her. Looking her in the eye. Telling her we wanted to help her. Slowly explaining everything we were going to do. Gently holding her hand. Giving her tough love through the difficult times of not wanting to take medications, deliberately throwing nutritional supplements on the floor and not even wanting to get out of bed on some days. It was emotionally and mentally tiring care for her at times. The more strength she gained the more her feisty, stubborn fourteen year old self emerged. She would lay quietly in bed while everybody else was singing around her, she would sleep late, miss breakfast and often stayed up late hanging out and chatting with the night shift nurses. She was a typical teenager but none of her life experiences reflected that of a normal fourteen year old. Her total stay at the clinic spanned about three months with many ups and downs, joys and sorrows.  I can't even begin to describe the emotional, spiritual and physical healing we saw over those three months. This loving, smart, fun and humorous fourteen year old slowly started making appearances over the weeks. She would pat our heads, grin and say something in Malagasy, give us a smirk when she was doing something she shouldn't be doing, always wanted to braid the nurses hair or paint their nails, admire our watches and sneakily ask to wear it for a shift. Turns out she knew the songs we were singing the whole time. The day I watched her singing, clapping, smiling and interacting with the other patients was the day I knew that Minette would never be the same and that she in turn had captured the hearts of every nurse and patient that she came in contact with. 

Minette's journey isn't over just yet. She will return to Mercy Ships in April for further surgery. Sadly, I won't be here in April to see her return...add that to the compiling list of reasons it will be difficult to leave this place in a few short weeks. At the same time though I'm joyful knowing that one greater than me loves her and holds her in the palms of His hands. I'm at peace knowing that He who began a good work in her will be faithful to complete all the things in her heart I witnessed begin to grow and blossom. I'm confident that we fed, clothed and loved the poorest of poor all for Gods glory and so that she may know the goodness, love and faithfulness of our God. 

 Minette's story is not completely uncommon here in Madagascar. There are thousands more just like her. Fourteen, sixteen, eighteen all the way up to sixty year old women suffering from obstetric fistulas. Although, the task of caring for these ladies and telling their stories feels overwhelming at times I know it must be done. As with all of our patients telling their stories gives you all a glimpse of what is going on around the world. It gives you knowledge and awareness which at some point will lead to action. That action will look different for each person. It could be as simple as stopping and saying a prayer for these ladies and all the patients Mercy Ships cares for. In this season of my life it looks like volunteering my time with Mercy Ships. Even more simple than all of this would be to just be aware of and reach out to the poorest of poor, the least of these that are surrounding you everyday.  

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The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.'" Matthew 25:40


Shared this video before but I think its worth another share. Enjoy! 

Along with the joy of pregnancy comes worry. In Canada, mother's can be comforted in knowing that skilled healthcare for moms and their babies is available if needed. This is severely lacking in Madagascar. Thousands of women who survive the complications related to pregnancy and childbirth suffer from a terrible injury called obstetric fistula. It is estimated that 2,000 Malagasy women develop fistula each year.Thousands of women have a story like Gisele's and Mercy Ships is working to alleviate their suffering and to bring hope and healing.Learn more: www.mercyships.ca/obstetric-fistula-surgeries/
Posted by Mercy Ships Canada on Thursday, January 22, 2015

Although I am currently serving with Mercy Ships, everything communicated here strictly reflects my personal opinions and is neither reviewed nor endorsed by Mercy Ships. Opinions, conclusions and other information expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of Mercy Ships. 

Good Gifts

December 31st officially marked 4 months since I arrived on the Africa Mercy. Cue the mixed emotions, lots of feelings and reflections on 2015 and all the good gifts the Lord has bestowed upon me. Little gifts like internet and video chat to stay connected with you all even when we are thousands of miles apart, life-long friendships that are forming, biking in good weather, good team work on a busy work day, and a simple interaction with a patient that makes them smile. Big gifts like losing my cellphone which was an inconvenience but also taught me that yes I can survive without a cellular device attached to me at all times. I know shocking. Bigger gifts like so much love and support from family and friends and my mom's ability to know me better than myself. (Sorry Dad, love you too!) This opportunity to serve the people of Madagascar with Mercy Ships that daily forces me to stand in awe of how good His timing is and how evident His goodness is in people's lives by restoring hope and healing. Being away from the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season this year allowed me to really reflect on God's greatest gift of His one and only Son. However, I have found myself at times still doubting His goodness. Sometimes I think could it all really be this good? There must be a catch. It can't be this simple. It's all too good to be true. Then I hear God whisper it is this good and yes it can get even better than this. I heard a pastor once say that a gift isn't a gift unless it is received. God can and longs to pour out all of these blessings but more often than not I find myself coming to him with my hands closed, holding on to what I deem best and in a sense preventing myself from receiving all of His goodness. This year God is challenging me to open up my hands, let go of my agenda, doubts, fears, bitterness and worries and receive the more than enough, over abundant and more then I can ask for or imagine good gifts that He has in store for me in 2016. 

"When you are overwhelmed with the goodness of God to you-you overflow with the goodness of God to others" Ann Voskamp

I write this all with a little hesitancy. I don't want to sound repetitive. I don't want to make it sound like everything is rainbows, butterfly's and fairy tales all the time. However, sometimes you have to take a moment to step back from all the nonsense and confusion swirling around you and stand on the promise  that "goodness and mercy shall follow you all the days of your life." He comes to bring life and life abundantly if we would only open our hands and hearts to receive it all. I'm challenging myself and you this year to put aside all that hinders you, trust that His ways are always perfect and with a willing heart receive all the good gifts God has in store for you this year. I don't know what those good gifts will look like for you. Maybe it's trusting Christ and allowing Him into your life, situation and heart for the first time (Ephesians 2:8-10). Maybe it's letting go of anger and bitterness and stepping into peace and joy. Perhaps it's putting the past behind you and confidently walking into the destiny and purpose he has for your life.                                                

                                            Praying that 2016 is the best one yet for all of you!

Taking care of these ladies is one of the best gifts of 2015! 

Another great gift. Building friendships and exploring this beautiful country of Madagascar:

Before 2015 ended I had the chance to go to another city in Madagascar called Antsirbe. The journey was long but in Madagascar traveling is all part of the fun and the scenery was breathtaking. Antisarbe is colorful, and busy with a lot of different shops and markets. The main attraction was a volcanic lake called Lake Tritriva. We walked around the lake and apparently some people go cliff diving here. The water is cold with no living thing due to the high levels of phosphate and sulfur. Don't worry we decided not to jump or swim :) 

My great traveling buddy Irene! 

This railway operates between the capital city of Tana and Tamatave but only for freight train use. 

Local post office

Capital city of Antananarivo

Finally, thanks to your generous support I have the full amount of my crew fees covered for the months that I extended! Another great gift :) If you still wish to donate I suggest you check out the Mercy Ships website, do some research for yourself and consider donating to the organization. Once again without supporters like you Mercy Ships can not bring this level of care to the poorest of the poor.  

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17

 Although I am currently serving with Mercy Ships, everything communicated here strictly reflects my personal opinions and is neither reviewed nor endorsed by Mercy Ships. Opinions, conclusions and other information expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of Mercy Ships.